why

I took it off because it was clear to me no matter how much I wrote no matter how much I explained no matter how many times when you asked me what I wanted it fell on deaf ears.

You asked me what I wanted I did the assignment I did as much as I could to help you. Because you asked for it. Yet it wasn't good enough. 

I'm not sure if you even understand what the role was. I don't understand why because i explained it time and time again. I cross posted pictures and copied statements because I didn't know how to explain it myself. And every time you asked me my response was the same. 

Everyone has their own ideas so I tried to work with what you told me you thought it was supposed to be like. But it's clear the definition you have to what I have is completely different. 

Then you wonder why I get so upset. Why I yell why I scream. Because you don't hear what I say. Even though it's been said hundreds of times before. 

A master is a master? A submissive is a submissive? The submissive gives themselves 

; submits; to the master. They give themselves to the master. They ask them to take over. If you didn't want that role you should of said it from day one instead of tearing my heart out again and again. 

I tried your way. You asked me what I wanted when I clearly said in my diary and assignments that it's not my choice. I don't want a choice. I waited for your commands and received little. Left to my own devices I floundered but apparently that's my fault. 

I couldn't ask you for help because I was ashamed. I failed your ideal. In turn I failed myself. 

I needed this. With the chaos in my head I dreamed that you could turn it off. Just for a while. But instead of reading me and my thoughts you kept asking WHEN I DONT KNOW THE ANSWER. 

so it's over. I admit defeat. I'll retreat to the chaos. Forever stuck in the cycle of madness that tears me apart day by day, hour by hour. 

I got your name tattooed. I BELONG TO YOU. Yet I was never EVER good enough.